i'm tired

she's coming back tonight hopefully.
i miss her.
i'm kinda freakin out.
i just need to lay down.

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Now playing: John Mayer - Gravity (Live)
via FoxyTunes

mother is

dying.

i'm worried about mom the most.

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Now playing: Da Bronski's - Goodbye 2 Yesterday
via FoxyTunes

i've been

reading alot

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Now playing: Lupe - Superstar (Acoustic Version)
via FoxyTunes

GOD BLESS ME

BLESS!!

Lord, please shine your light down  upon me
 Lord, grant me good fortune don't shun me
Take all this unhappiness from me
 Say, am I just crazy?? Well, GOD BLESS ME!

Now Lord, save me a place there upon the ark
I have been wandering in the dark
 Put me into your collection
Lord, am I not worth your salvation?

It's all a masquerade
 Just who is who,  can't say
Don't leave me in the cold
Just who is fake, who's real?? GOD BLESS ME!

So Lord, why do you watch from the sidelines?
War, it's being fought on the frontlines
Say, what is your final intention?
Lord, I've kinda lost my conviction

It's all a masquerade
 Just who is who, I can't say
Don?t leave me in the cold
 Just who is fake, who's real?? GOD BLESS ME!

BLESS!!

Why do we have a word for truth
 When the whole damn world's an April fool?
How come we find an antidote
 When germs grow fast and break the rules?
Why do I soil my clean white shoes
 When it won't be long before they're old and worn?
Are you sad or are you happy?
 How this pretension makes me yawn

GOD BLESS ME!
 It's all a masquerade
Just who is who, I can't say
 Don't leave me in the cold
Just who is fake, who's real?

It's all a masquerade
 Just who is who, I can't say
Don't leave me in the cold
 Just who is fake, who's real?? GOD BLESS ME!

she's gone...

don't try to miss her too much J.

seriously.

try hard.

I'm Yours

Well you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks
and now I'm trying to get back
Before the cool done run out
I'll be giving it my bestest
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

I won't hesitate no more,
It cannot wait, I'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love
Listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
A lá peaceful melody
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved

So I won't hesitate no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer
My breath fogged up the glass
And so I drew a new face and laughed
I guess what i'ma saying is there ain't no better reason
To rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
It's what we aim to do
Our name is our virtue

I won't hesitate no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
this is our fate, I'm yours

Well no no, well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find the sky is yours
Listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
A lá one big family
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved

I won't hesitate no more,
It cannot wait, I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm you

No please, don't complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

No please, don't hesitate
no more,
It cannot wait
The sky is yours!

so after venting

i do feel a bit better.
that n.e.r.d. song helps.
idk these upcoming weeks are gonna be hard and i'm NOT lookin forward to em.
...
shit happens.
just blow it off.